Valentine's Day

Create me something new.
Make it bright, exciting.
Something unforgettable.
I don't need it to be sensual
so long as it fills my senses.

Something to cover me up
when I get cold inside

Something to heal my heart
when it feels raw and aching
and the hurt still burns.

Something to dry my tears
A cool breeze for the angry ones
A blanket for the scared ones
A warm touch for the sad ones
Love for the hopeless ones.

Until all that is left is acceptance
And strength, and healing
and the capacity to love again.

Somehow, when things fall apart
you find the pieces
and I realize, every time
that your love, when it
reassembles these fragments
...it is so much greater
than any other love
that took my symmetry
for granted
when it was whole.

Thank you.

Song: Sugar Ray - She Falls Apart
Picture: You'll Never Know How I Feel

Random Bruisings

Okay, so, Friday I had a small accident, and I bruised my knee a little. Today, I'm lying in bed, and this bruise has grown really big. And there's a whole bunch of these random bruises all around it. Then I look down both my legs, and both of them are just covered, back and front, in these small bruises, most about the size of a dollar, but some about the size of golf ball or even a little bigger.

All in all, I have 16 bruises on my legs. Not only that, but during TF training last weekend, my friend Andrew hip-checked me and I have a pretty good sized bruise from that (okay, he checked me REALLY hard and he has bony hips, but that's still weird). This is odd because I normally have really good iron, and I don't actually bruise that easily. Not to mention, these bruises are ALL over. Randomly disbursed. Just my lower body, though, not my arms or anything.

So, I just noticed this today, I have a lot of bruises and it's weird. I wonder if there's something abnormal going on? Other than my normal clumsiness?

Going to sleep now. But, if anything else exciting happens, if I grow green asparagus out of my ears or I start sprouting pink feathers out of my nose, realize that my body is being taken over by some strange new force and it's not me!!

Okay I really need sleep.

Song: Shawn Mullins - Lullabye
Picture: I like leaves

Feminism: To she or not to she?

Some quotes from "Black Tights: Women, Sport, and Sexuality", a book I am reading for my sport sociology class:

"As long as the idealized male sporting body is defined as violent and aggressive, I believe that all women and girls will know in our hearts that no matter how strong we are, as we run on city paths and country trails and ride our bikes across continents, we are still not safe."

Funny, because I never feel stronger or more in control than when I'm doing a long bike trip or going for a run. I leave behind everything that bothers me or makes me feel "unsafe" because that run, that bike trip, is MINE, and nobody can touch me or hurt me when I'm out there. It's just me against the elements. Strong and free.

-Europe has about a 50-50 split in women and men in politics and positions of power. Media sport coverage of women is roughly equal to that of sport coverage of men (aka, rowing, soccer, tennis, etc.). North America, on the other hand, has about 2-3% of sport coverage devoted to women sport, and a slightly higher percentage of women in politics.

I'm not a feminist. I think that women, for the most part, have equal opportunities as men in North America, and if I someday have some old geezer of a boss that thinks a guy deserves a bigger paycheck or a better position just because of that Y chromosome and no other valid reason, I'll work hard and be smart enough that I'll kick that old geezer out of his comfy chair and take HIS place and make sure things are right. Feminism, for the most part, just annoys me; I feel like there was a place and time for it, and that time is over. Women can make their own place now if they work hard enough.

BUT up until now, I would have argued that things don't really get much better than right now for women in North America. That feminists don't have a place any more, that nothing can really be changed any further for the better, equality wise. Now, I think I might be wrong. Have I just been satisfied with the way things are, not because I envisioned better, but because that's just the way "things are and have always been?"

Just because universities are mainly attended by women, doesn't seem to mean that women are given equal status. I'm not picturing myself leading some kind of national revolution. I believe in "think global, act local, stay hopeful." But I want to see a female prime minister. I want to see women athletes treated, if not as equals, at least as equally deserving of respect and media attention. Why should women here not be treated as they are in Europe? Because here we are hockey and football and basketball? Is it really because we are based around more agressive and violent sports?

I realize this might be a taboo subject, but I promise, I respect all opinions and beliefs offered up. I'd really like to hear your take on this matter, even if you don't have a strong opinion.

Song: Hedley - On My Own
Picture: I'd explain it to you, but...

PS. One more point. 99% of the guys I know treat women very well and this is not at all trying to say that they don't. In fact, I might pretend to be disgusted at female sexist jokes, but I know that's all they are, so it's hard not to snicker a little bit. If anyone actually meant them, we all know I would pull out the trusty skillet.